


I'd Give Up Forever to Touch You

by imafriendlydalek



Series: The TJ/Colin Boston fics [2]
Category: Political Animals, What's Your Number? (2011)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Bisexual Male Character, Coming Out, Fluff, Happy Ending, Homophobia, M/M, basically Colin's dad is an asshole
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-02
Updated: 2017-11-02
Packaged: 2019-01-28 14:49:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,551
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12609032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imafriendlydalek/pseuds/imafriendlydalek
Summary: Colin and TJ meet at music school in Boston. This is their story.





	I'd Give Up Forever to Touch You

**Author's Note:**

> So, a while ago I wrote a ficlet that was unusual for me in that it had a sad ending. I felt really bad about it - poor TJ! - and vowed to write the happy version. I started it, set it aside, picked it up again, decided I loved the premise and wanted to write something like it as an original novel. But I didn't want to leave that sad piece all alone, so here's the happy version. Sort of.

Colin’s first impression of TJ had been “What an asshole.” It’s funny how first impressions don’t always last.

In Colin’s defense, TJ _had_ been an asshole. He’d walked full-force into Colin because he hadn’t been watching where he was going, too wrapped up in his conversation with whoever was on the other end of that call and too strung out to notice his surroundings.

In TJ’s defense, he’d been on the phone with his mom, and his parents had just announced that they were getting a divorce. It had been a rough time in TJ Hammond’s life.

Colin’s impression had been cemented later that week, when it turned out that they were in the same class and the “too cool to be here, too cool to care” attitude TJ gave off had gotten the better of Colin. Some people had had to work to get into this program, some people had to work to be able to go to this school, some people actually had to worry about things like grades. Couldn’t all be born into a big family name with an even bigger fortune.

Then their professor had gone and assigned them to the same group for a project that would make up 30% of their grade for the class, so Colin had been forced to work with that asshole. And somewhere along the line, he’d gotten to know TJ a bit better, and they’d bonded over coffee and sharing stories of how their parents had wronged them. So despite his best efforts, Colin had actually grown to like the guy. To think of him as a friend.

And then St. Patrick’s Day had happened, and TJ had looked up at him through those ridiculous giant sparkly clover glasses with slightly unfocused eyes - because Boston takes St. Patrick’s Day seriously, and they’d started drinking somewhere around mid-morning - and he’d been wearing a shirt that said “KISS ME I’M IRISH” even though Colin had pointed out that TJ wasn’t Irish, but TJ had said everyone was Irish on St. Patrick’s Day, even if they were from North Carolina, and Colin had taken it as an invitation, and then they’d been kissing, so much kissing, as if there was nothing else in the world. 

Until TJ had pushed him away, had said he didn’t want to be anyone’s “gay adventure or whatever the fuck you’re trying to do, Shea” just before he’d stormed out and Colin hadn’t seen him for almost a month. Plenty of time for Colin to replay that moment again in his mind, over and over, to agonize about what he could have - or should have - done differently, to recall the softness of TJ’s lips against his, the contrasting roughness of stubble on his chin, so unlike what Colin was used to. 

But fuck, there was no denying what was there - that Colin had feelings for TJ, was attracted to him in a way he’d never really been into a guy before. Colin had no idea what to do with those feelings. He couldn’t talk to any of his bandmates about it - they’d be weirded out, or wouldn’t know how to deal with it either. He definitely couldn’t talk to his family about it. Mostly, he just really wanted to talk to TJ. “Bisexual” felt like a big word - he’d always assumed it meant equally attracted to both men and women. That didn’t feel right; Colin was definitely more attracted to women than men. Actually, TJ was the only man he was attracted to. Actually, TJ was the only person he had eyes for those days. Two things were for sure: he was totally gone for TJ, and he missed him like hell.

It was a fairly small campus, thankfully, so they couldn’t avoid each other forever. Radio silence ended, thank fucking god, on a dreary day in April, when Colin had been running across the quad to get to the library and out of the rain just as TJ was leaving the building.

In hindsight, yeah, it was all pretty _The Notebook_ , with the rain and the shouting and the angry confessions and professions of love and finally, fucking finally, kissing. And catcalls behind them, but who the fuck cared when TJ was wrapped in his arms and kissing back just as fiercely? Definitely not Colin.

They’d both had class later that day but hadn’t made it - Colin was generally more fastidious that TJ about actually attending classes, but he wasn’t the least bit sorry this time as they fell into bed together. Any lingering doubts Colin may have had about being able to go through with this with a guy were washed away as TJ peeled off his own and then Colin’s soaked shirt and closed the gap between them, TJ’s naked skin sliding against Colin’s. Yep, definitely not going to be a problem. 

They kept their relationship under wraps at first, that initial confession in the middle of campus notwithstanding, and things were great. TJ had his own place, which made finding privacy way easier than at Colin’s parent’s house. Colin was surprised and still somewhat dazed by how easily they fit together, slotting into one another’s lives as if they’d just been waiting all this time for the other to show up. Weekends were spent making music together - when they managed to not get distracted by each other, that is. TJ cleaned up his act slowly but steadily with Colin’s support, and by the end of the spring semester, he was steadily “on the wagon” and happy. Colin, though he’d always been a prolific songwriter, found his inspiration to be at an all-new level and managed to land a spot playing at the Un-Common Boston summer concert in the Commons. It was a huge deal, and Colin was over the moon about it, at least until he realized it would mean his parents would be there.

They weren’t going to able to keep things a secret forever anyway - sooner or later, someone would post a picture of TJ Hammond and his new boyfriend and it would capture the press’s attention for the requisite fifteen minutes. Just long enough for Colin’s family to catch wind of it, his sister Amy being the gossip-rag junkie that she was. They decided instead to grab the bull by the horns and introduce TJ to his family beforehand. At least this way, no one could hold having to find out about them through Instagram or InTouch against them.

That was about the only positive thing to be said about their attempt at introducing TJ to Colin’s family. Amy had been the best about it - she was too busy fixating on “my brother is dating someone famous” to care about “my brother is dating a guy.” His mother, ever in the shadow of his father, too timid to be open about her own feelings, had said nothing, though her tears had said it all. It was no surprise that Colin’s father, staunch Republican that he was, had reacted the way he had - with strong words that were meant to hurt, words that tore down not only TJ’s sexual orientation (while accusing him of somehow “turning” Colin, as if gayness were like vampirism, what the fuck) but also TJ’s family, since clearly this was all just the result of their evil, liberal ways.

That was when Colin had stormed out, TJ close behind him, as Colin’s father shouted after them that Colin shouldn’t bother coming back, that this home wasn’t open to “nancy boys” and that he hadn’t spent all these years working hard to put Colin through school just to have him turn into a- well, Colin and TJ hadn’t stuck around to hear the end of that rant.

Colin didn’t know why he was crying as he lay in bed - TJ’s bed, with TJ curled around him, stroking his hair comfortingly - but he had, hot tears that he couldn’t stop, or couldn’t be bothered to fight.

He’d gone back a few days later, on a Wednesday evening while his dad was out at the bar with his buddies as usual, to collect a few things. His mother had cried the whole time again, though Colin suspected it was more about losing her son than about his relationship status. “Take care of yourself, Colin,” she’d said quietly, reaching out as if she was about to pull him into a hug but stopping halfway. “You too, Ma,” he’d replied before stepping out the door.

He wasn’t going to let his father’s bigotry or his mother’s meekness drag him down, he decided. Instead, he threw himself into his music with a fervor. When Un-Common Boston came around, Colin was ready for it, and he kicked ass. He’d played a few gigs around Boston and they’d had pretty good turnout, but nothing like this. The field where the stage was set up was almost full to capacity with concert-goers - sure, it was a free concert, so there was bound to be a crowd, but no one was forcing them to stay or to cheer between songs the way that they were. Colin could feel the blood rushing in his ears. The crowd was cheering just for him, TJ was waiting backstage. This was it - this was exactly what he wanted his life to be.


End file.
